Me and Eva actually broke-off after 4 years of relationship, she gave up on me....
It really made me think what's this 4 years is about....
It all started when I left Australia while she is still there.... We used to talk everyday for hours....
She mixed around with new friends and I guess she was influenced slightly, during September last year (2006), started going clubbing, always ignore my calls during clubbing...I was totally ignored.... no phone calls at all for a months time, I wondered what was wrong.... Come to think of it, it must be a third party... but i never make sure this, anyhow it will not make any difference....
I started going out with another girl just to test the water, I needed to know how important am i to Eva, soon enough she found out... I was cheating on her... I felt really bad and I hurt both sides, Eva and Nicole. I guess revenge is not sweet at all....I learnt my lesson the hard way....
After that I tried a lot of way to get close to Eva again but seemingly it all failed... I even brought her to HK but i guess.....she only wanted to go to HK and not getting back with me, it makes no difference even for this trip. I guess there is someone else that is more capable than me and he can provide her much more than I can....
There was a picture that i took with Nicole( i was kissing her) Eva looked though my computer found that picture and everything got from bad to worse.... Since then she is always busy not answering my phone calls at all.... and most of the time hanging out with her "friends".... This continued on until Feb 2007 during the chinese new year when I went to meet her in Ipoh...but I came back as a failure...
Since the break up she never called me at all... that shows how much she loved me.... she only loves me for what I can give her i guess.....
All of this made clear to me that no matter what I will never be with someone who loves themselves more than me... I guess life in KL is fast, more choices and the "better" ones are always around.
Through this 6 months process of pain i guess... nothing was important to me at all.... my life was never in my control after all... my love life that i cherished so much died away with someone else, I guess I can never learn to love someone the right way....
Eva did made me realize I was too damn proud of myself, which i agree and accept...
One day I will show her I am capable to be proud!!!
I did really feel so much pain when I couldn't take it and broke up with her, she didn't even shed a tear.
I guess...you should never love a girl too damn much to let them climb over your head... that is the biggest lesson I learnt from this relationship
